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New to Al-Anon?
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July 2022

New Bylaws Approved by Board for Council Presentation ​
   

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Photo by Clif H
The Bylaws Committee started its mission about 2 years ago.  It was as if they had a premonition of the legal changes the state would require this year.  The Committee presented the revised AIS Bylaws to the Board on June 18, 2022.  In a very efficient and effective presentation, the Committee walked through the changes, the new language, and an explanation of the need.  The Board Members helped clarify and edit a few items.  After an hour of thoughtful presentation and discussion, the Board voted unanimously for the Committee to present the Proposal at the August 11, 2022, Council meeting.

The primary changes to the Bylaws are to:
  1. Reflect on our current operations
  2. Incorporate the language used in the original 1980 Articles of Incorporation
  3. Incorporate all new Washington State requirements for non-profits that appear to tighten the rules to prevent fraudulent non-profit status.

​Many of the changes are semantics to comply with the new state law.  For example, all non-profits are required to hold an annual meeting for elections and financial reports. We will formally call the November Council meeting our “annual meeting,” where we will conduct elections and present the next year’s budget as we have done in years past.
The current Bylaws require a 60-day notification to Council Members for any Bylaw changes.  Therefore, all known Council Members were sent an email to comply on June 11, 2022. (An update was sent on 6/22/22 with amendments made at the Board meeting.)  To request a copy of the Council notice and documents, please email the Committee Chair, vicechair@seattle-al-anon.org.

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Communication and Miscommunication
by Clif H

Step Seven

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.


Over the years, how my alcoholic and I interacted and communicated had developed into an often unsightly mess.  While we didn’t regularly yell at each other, it did happen.  The more bothersome behavior was that I used words that were hurtful, condescending, denigrating, unkind, sarcastic, etc. As I’ve grown in the program, one of the greatest gifts was the realization while taking my inventory that I had developed flawed communication patterns.  So, in Step Seven, I asked my Higher Power to remove this character defect.

Over time, my Higher Power has delivered simple situations to me, where, in the past I would have reacted with harsh words, used my best sarcastic voice, and been just plain mean-spirited in my response.  However, by actively considering my request in Step Seven, I’ve been practicing responding with intentionally kind words instead of reacting as before while still maintaining my personal viewpoint.  As a result, I can tell her no, or even insist on a yes without being a jerk.

The other piece of my recovery is a better understanding of my alcoholic’s communication style.  There are times when her tone still carries the message of sarcasm or unkindness.  I no longer take the tone or the words at “face value.”  Instead, I listen and look for the positiveness that she might be attempting to express.  It is almost always discovered in our conversations these days.  For instance, a conversation that occurred this very day went something like this.

Her: I noticed that you turned on the air conditioner while you were inside all day (spoken with that tone).
Me in the past (spoken with a tone as though I would never have turned it on if she were the one in the house all day and I wasn’t).
Me today: (it’s 95 degrees outside today, and she is thankful that the AC is running and it’s cool in the house)  You are welcome.  It is comfortable.

Through working Step Seven, our communications have improved, and the frequency of our miscommunications has decreased.  For that, I’m a grateful Al-Anon.

​Step Seven
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
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Enjoy Talking on the Phone or Sleeping on the Job?

Seattle Al-Anon Information Service (AIS) Is Looking for Phone Volunteers!

Shifts are available 7 days a week in 3-hour intervals starting at 7am during the day, and at night there is one shift starting at 10:30pm, which goes until 7am.

The focus is to answer questions about Al-Anon and Alateen’s meeting times and Zoom availability, to give hope to people whose lives may be affected by someone else’s drinking, and to help others reach the appropriate source of help.

A manual is provided with resource numbers and helpful suggestions on maintaining anonymity and talking to people in distress.

FOR INFORMATION, PLEASE CONTACT
phones@seattle-al-anon.org
​

Let Everyone Know If Your Meeting Has:

  • Gone back to meeting in person
  • Become hybrid
  • Has a new physical location
  • Made other changes that members need to know about

​Please send all meeting changes to the WA Area Group Records Coordinator [https://wa-al-anon.org/meeting-changes/]
Changes and Updates are made Weekly.
(Seattle AIS is cc'd in the change request)
 
If you have any questions or concerns regarding the Seattle AIS updated meeting schedule, ​please contact meetingdirectoryeditor@seattle-al-anon.org 

Inspiration

Heard in a meeting:  "Figuring things out is not one of the 12 Steps."
Tradition Seven
Every group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.
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Need a Free Newcomer Packet?

Anyone local to Seattle who is a newcomer and wants an individual newcomer packet (or in Spanish, too!), please send an email to LDC@seattle-al-anon.org with the name and mailing address.

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Al-Anon Mailbag

Samantha from Sammamish asks:

I'm having difficulties submitting meeting changes to the WA Area website.  Are there any tricks to make it go smoothly?

The key is to first Log in and then open the Meeting Change Form. 
Go to: 
https://wa-al-anon.org/ ​
Scroll to the bottom of the page where it says:  ​Please login Here
That will take you to the Login page:  https://wa-al-anon.org/login/
Note: you must login to request changes.
From that page, hover over Resources, then over For Members, then Make Meeting Changes (Group Records); which opens the Meeting Change Form page: 
https://wa-al-anon.org/meeting-changes/
Complete the form with the new information for your meeting and click Submit at the bottom of the page.
AIS Council Meeting
The next Council meeting is July 14, 2022, 7:30-9:00 pm.  Check the AIS website calendar (https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/events) for the zoom link.  Or the Council Meeting direct link https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/council-meeting.htm

Throwing in the Towel
by Allen L

Picture an Al-Anon member driving down the road with a towel in his lap, talking to his Higher Power.

The towel represents his character defects, so he tears off a small part of the towel, throws it out the window, and asks his Higher Power, “Is that enough?” Then, a mile later, he tears off another piece of the towel, throws it out the window, and again asks, “Is that enough?”
 
When I talked to my sponsor about why I can’t seem to throw the whole towel out at once, his reply is, “Welcome to the human race!”
 
It seems to be human nature to be unable to let go of an old habit all at once. So, they depart a little at a time.  And that’s OK.
 
The important part is that I continue to let go of the old and accept a new way of thinking and acting.
 
Progress not perfection.

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​The Relief of Grief

I suppose I have been cycling through the stages of grief for some time now.  I often wake with a heavy depression settling around me, like an unwanted blanket that pins me to the bed.  The alcoholic’s wants and needs too often eclipse my own.  Bewilderment and guilt surface as I try to distinguish enabling from reasonable accommodation.  It is an exhausting dance of trying to reach a sensible balance with someone who is often uncooperative and reckless.   

When the alcoholic appears to be rational and competent, I may slip into denial.  I get confused and lose my bearings until the reality of alcohol’s cunning nature slaps me in the face once again. I feel anger as I realize I have somehow been duped and have succumbed to manipulation or magical thinking.  I protest the carnage and collateral damage inflicted upon the alcoholic and those in proximity to them.

In the book Opening Our Hearts, Transforming Our Losses, p. 23, this line struck a chord, “Living with alcoholism can feel like we’re in a constant state of mourning.” Residing in the same house with an alcoholic loved one rips the veneer off of any former misconception or wishful thinking.  It takes a tremendous amount of energy to determine reality when under the spell of an alcoholic.  I also must contend with my over-functioning sense of responsibility and instinctive desire to alleviate pain in others.

So far, grief sounds like an arduous task thrust upon us within the torturous dungeons of alcoholism, where one may find themselves shackled alongside their alcoholic loved one. I have gone to battle against the bottle and the resulting unacceptable behaviors by twisting myself into someone I don’t want to be.  However, I am finding much relief in prayer, tears, and acceptance. 

Working with the process is far more productive than fighting it.  Acceptance.  Surrender.  Letting go.  The tears come, and I am allowing the vulnerability with myself and God.  I am releasing my loved ones and all the issues that I have become entangled with.  I pray for clarity, insight, and the wisdom to know the difference.  I pray for the ability to move forward on my recovery journey despite the residual feelings of fear, obligation, and guilt. I pray for the courage to enter unfamiliar territory. 

I am leaning into this season of mourning.  My eyes are puffy, and my whole being is fatigued.  It is like my spirit is in an essential state of hibernation. I will cocoon into a protected space while I shed more layers of dysfunction.   My highest calling is to guard this process and to take in nourishing resources so I may emerge more functional and whole.​
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Concept Seven

The Trustees have legal rights while the rights of the Conference are traditional.
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Delving into the Concepts
by Emily S

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Photo by Clif H
Concept Seven

The Trustees have legal rights while the rights of the Conference are traditional.

Hello again, I am here to decode the Concepts a little.  At first glance, this one makes little sense to my newbie brain. I'm sure it has significance. Otherwise, it wouldn't be included, so I will try to understand it.  In How Al-Anon Works, my go-to book for all things introductory, I can see a faint light at the end of the tunnel. "The (Board of) Trustees have legal rights" part of the Concept "constitutes the legal entity of Al-Anon and is ultimately responsible for Al-Anon's funds, services, our adherence to the law, and the necessity to protect Al-Anon's resources by taking legal action if required" (p. 135).  Contrast that to the "rights of the Conference" which "is Al-Anon's largest group conscience, guardians of our spiritual principles in the Twelve Traditions and the Twelve Concepts of Service." (p. 135).

Ok, so the idea here is that the Board of Trustees keeps us all in check. Legally. At our Seattle AIS, we have quarterly Board meetings, and although I've never been to one, I bet they deal with Al-Anon legal issues frequently.  How Al-Anon Works has only one page dedicated to Concept Seven, but Paths to Recovery has six pages! (p. 289). I like the expanded summary in this book because it focuses on a question I had early on when I wondered what would happen if the Board of Trustees and the Conference disagreed.  What happens then?  I'm not sure of any specific instances, but they both work together.  "When the Conference acknowledges the rights, duties and legal responsibilities of the Trustees, and the Trustees remember the traditional rights of the Conference representing the group conscience of our fellowship, a harmonious and respectful working relationship can be maintained.  Each is important and neither becomes a rubber stamp for the other." (p. 290).

My last source of information comes from the Al-Anon history book Many Voices, One Journey, where they briefly address Concept Seven. This simple yet important quote, "Where there is money, especially in a non-profit organization, trustees are needed to keep check that it is spent with discretion and care" (p. 67).

Trying to Collect Al-Anon Coins 
by Eric G
Archives  Coordinator

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One of the things I like about AA is their ability to celebrate their sobriety with the gift of giving coins for numerous milestones. There are 1-hour coins, 24-hour coins, 1-week, 1-month, 3-month, 6-month, 1-year, etc., coins. After one year, 18 months is the only milestone celebrated with a coin besides solid years. This tradition occurs at many AA meetings daily and includes coins that are very creative. Lots of colors, themes, and images are imprinted on dozens of coins. I'm including a few here, which I hope is permissible.
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In Al-Anon, the coin options are few. A quick online search can reveal the results for you. Al-Anon coins are often sold along with coins from other 12-step programs, so the words "Al-Anon" do not always appear on the coin. Our logo is unique enough, however, for one to find which coins really belong to members. I've found a few different Al-Anon coin styles and have collected as many as I could. To my knowledge, they are not passed out in meetings regularly and are not officially part of the organization like they seem to be in AA. As a general coin nut like myself, I am both thrilled to have any Al-Anon coins but also wish there were more.  I am very jealous of AA's coin collection, and I encourage you to browse their other coins if you are interested. While it is possible to buy some colorful and creative coins with a shared slogan or the closing prayer and use these as Al-Anon coins, they are not uniquely for Al-Anon members. 

I have even gone so far as to design my own Seattle-themed Al-Anon coin, complete with the Space Needle on one side and the slogan "One Day at a Time'' (my favorite) on the other side, with the words circling our logo. When I reached out to WSO with my idea, they were less than thrilled. Even if I were to make and sell them and give the money to Seattle AIS, it blurs the line of Tradition Six. I understand their decision, but I still wish there was a way for members in Seattle to have a coin just for us. I think I would have to give them away for free for it to be possible, and a recent inquiry to a custom coin maker provided an estimate of $7 a coin. I can't afford that. 

One example of Seattle Al-Anon coins are those given away at the men's retreat at Fort Worden.  The first casting was misspelled as Warden, pictured above. (Editorial note: The coin die was made incorrectly; however, rather than have it re-made, the original members decided to keep it as a reminder that our focus is on “progress, not perfection,” and it remains misspelled to this day). While these coins are interesting, unique, and special, they feel similar in weight and quality to the tokens one would get at an old video arcade. None of the other Al-Anon coins for sale online are this size or weight. Below, I am inserting pictures of the Al-Anon coins I have purchased. They are the size of a half dollar, both in diameter and weight but made of bronze. These simple styles are what make Al-Anon coins.
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In closing, I would like to share the coin I keep in my wallet (above right). I chose this one because I love the design of the butterfly and the font, as It reminds me of cartoons I watched during my childhood. Al-Anon coins are nice and simple, but they cannot match the creativity, color, and attractiveness of AA coins.

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​Order the Forum Magazine
Al-Anon’s monthly magazine features timely sharings from Al-Anon and Alateen members, suggested meeting topics, and the latest information on worldwide Al-Anon recovery. Experience and insight you won’t find anywhere else!

Al-Anon Joke of the Month

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Do you have a funny or not-so-funny Al-Anon joke?  Please send it to ​newslettereditor@seattle-al-anon.org

2022 WA Area Speakers Convention

WA Area is hosting the 2022 Speakers Convention on October 21-22, 2022, at the South Puget Sound Community College in Lacey.  This is a free event, and we hope you will save the date to attend a weekend of speakers and workshop panels.  The Speakers Convention Committee needs your support in financial donations to offset the cost of travel and hotel for our speakers, venue rental, etc.  Please consider donating directly to our Venmo account or contact our convention treasurer at waspeakers2022@gmail.com.
 
Venmo for 2022 WA Area Speakers Convention
@WAAreaSpeakersConvention​

June 2022 AIS Council Meeting Minutes (Summary)

No Council meeting was held in June

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Photo by Logan H

Thank you for your donations and your support of AIS!
Our funding now comes primarily from:
*Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
*Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
​Donate Now

And More ...

MEETING SCHEDULE:   registered Al-Anon groups in the Greater Seattle Area.  All virtual and in-person meetings are listed.  
Meeting Schedule
Please visit our Members section for the most up-to-date information on:
  • List of AIS Officers and Coordinators
  • Where to Send Donations
  • District Representatives and Business Meeting Information
  • AIS Financial Information​
  • Calendar of Events

Meeting News Column

Meeting Changes Reported during June
Complete details at: https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/meetings.html/ 

Changes are in a color font.

  • Monday, 10:30 AM, Monday Morning Jump Start AFG - CC 
  • Monday, 5:30 PM, Mountain AFG, IN-PERSON ONLY - NEW
  • Tuesday, 10:00 AM, Renton Tuesday Morning AFG, HYBRID - Zoom Meeting - ID: 84884414516 | Code 968969 
  • Tuesday, 7:00 PM, Parents and Friends AFG - 60 minutes
  • Wednesday, 7:00 AM, Hope for Today AFG - CONCURRENT
  • Thursday, 12:30 PM, Sound Serenity AFG - 60 minutes
  • Thursday, 7:00 PM new time, Madison Madrona AFG - IN-PERSON ONLY / BIPOC / LGBTQIA 
  • Friday, 10:00 AM, Highlands Friday AM AFG - Zoom-Only Meeting
  • Friday, 7:30 PM, Burien Friday Night AFG, IN-PERSON ONLY - Book Study: Reaching for Personal Freedom 
  • Friday, 7:30 PM, Seattle Men’s AFG, IN-PERSON ONLY 
  • Saturday, 11:00 AM, Search for Serenity AFG -  HYBRID - BYOB
  • Sunday, 12:00 PM, Sunday Nooners AFG - SUSPENDED
  • Sunday, 7:30 PM, Auburn Sunday Night AFG - HYBRID
OUR OFFICE IS NOT OPEN FOR LITERATURE PICK UP. WE SHIP ORDERS EVERY THURSDAY. FIND ORDERING INFORMATION, HERE.
Office Address: 509 10th Ave E  #100, Seattle, WA 98102 ​ MAP
Mailing Address: 505 Broadway E #400, Seattle, WA  98102-5023
Email us. Talk with a member - (206) 625-0000

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