The other day as I was riding my bicycle on the trail along the river, I observed some fowl paddling around in a gentle eddy pool. Immediately the thought crossed my mind how closely this corresponded to my experiences with my alcoholic. At any given moment, I could be in the midst of a raging white-capped river or a calm water pool beside it. Just as the duck drops out of the sky onto water, so do I arrive home from the office. One significant difference is that the duck can choose to light in the pool or the rapidly flowing river, whereas I land blind each day. Is the alcoholic raging, or are they calm? While unable to choose the environment into which I will land, thanks to the tools of Al-Anon, I'm able to prepare myself for whatever I encounter upon arrival.
Additionally, if I land in the raging river, I have tools available today to be ok. It may not be possible to paddle immediately over to the calm pool; however, it is possible to go with the flow instead of being focused on and insisting on fighting the worst of the currents. Even on the flight in, I can surround myself with a flock so that I arrive without being exhausted.
Through the study and practice of the Al-Anon Program, it is possible for me (us) to find contentment and even happiness, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not.
Additionally, if I land in the raging river, I have tools available today to be ok. It may not be possible to paddle immediately over to the calm pool; however, it is possible to go with the flow instead of being focused on and insisting on fighting the worst of the currents. Even on the flight in, I can surround myself with a flock so that I arrive without being exhausted.
Through the study and practice of the Al-Anon Program, it is possible for me (us) to find contentment and even happiness, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not.
AIS Council Meeting - May Thursday, May 12 from 7:30 to 9:00 PM Zoom Meeting ID: 839 6957 0120 Passcode: 001086 Step Five Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. |
Al-Anon Mailbag
Enrique from Edmonds asks:
How much does your group pay for your meeting space? Did the amount change post-pandemic? |
Let everyone know if your meeting has:#1 Gone back to meeting in person #2 Become hybrid #3 Has a new physical location #4 Made other changes that members need to know about Please send all meeting changes to the WA Area Group Records Coordinator [https://wa-al-anon.org/meeting-changes/] Changes and Updates are made Weekly. (Seattle AIS is cc'd in the change request) If you have any questions or concerns regarding the Seattle AIS updated meeting schedule, please contact meetingdirectoryeditor@seattle-al-anon.org Tradition Five
Each Al-Anon Family Group has but one purpose: to help families of alcoholics. We do this by practicing the Twelve Steps of AA ourselves, by encouraging and understanding our alcoholic relatives, and by welcoming and giving comfort to families of alcoholics. |
|
Step 5 Poem
|
Finding My Power
The topsy-turvy, emotionally reactive world of the alcoholic can be quite daunting to maneuver around. At any age, an alcoholic parent may have the power to verbally annihilate their vulnerable adult child. My incredibly painful journey of trying to find some kind of balance and ability to “live” in an alcoholic household has finally shown some progress!
For years I found myself engulfed in caretaking, manipulated and bullied, and being reduced to a powerless childlike state by the volcanic rages erupting from the alcoholic. I was constantly being sucked into the insane crises-laden existence that they created. Agonizing sleepless nights of worry and dread. Waking up to the tyranny of the alcoholic’s responsibilities that somehow became mine. Feeling guilty for desperately wanting out of this snare, longing to have the freedom and energy to invest in my own wellbeing.
Al-Anon describes enabling basically as doing something for someone that they are capable of doing for themselves. As I have been detaching in increments over time, my perspective has gained clarity from a formerly muddy view. I am astounded at how I have been “played” (manipulated and coerced) to take on so many of the alcoholic’s responsibilities, both monumental and minor. I also blindly stepped in and anticipated what may be needed, and have even soothed the alcoholic’s self-pitying moods!
As a result of my “overly responsible” behavior, I end up bewildered and drained of my energy and resources. Part of my insanity is my tenacious ability to regroup and try again from a slightly different angle! However, the only person in the relationship that has the drive and capacity to change is me!
At first, it was hard to “step back.” I still had that relentless urge to protect and accommodate. I feared the alcoholic’s rages and verbal tirades that happened regularly during interactions. However, I have found significant serenity in limiting my exposure to the alcoholic.
In order to “let go” and focus on myself, I have created a safe space with a lock on the door. This room is equipped with cable, Wi-Fi, computer/printer, books, recovery materials, journals, fan, bed, and a lounge chair. Within this room, I am insulated from hearing any of the routine shenanigans and am less likely to worry over the alcoholic getting home safely.
Although I am powerless over alcohol and the alcoholic … I still have power in my life. I am gaining momentum as I disengage from the mayhem and curtail my fruitless guilt-laden patterns of “rescue.” As my mindset expands, more choices appear as if by magic! Going forward, I endeavor to spend my time more proactively in alignment with my values. I am exploring fresh dreams!
For years I found myself engulfed in caretaking, manipulated and bullied, and being reduced to a powerless childlike state by the volcanic rages erupting from the alcoholic. I was constantly being sucked into the insane crises-laden existence that they created. Agonizing sleepless nights of worry and dread. Waking up to the tyranny of the alcoholic’s responsibilities that somehow became mine. Feeling guilty for desperately wanting out of this snare, longing to have the freedom and energy to invest in my own wellbeing.
Al-Anon describes enabling basically as doing something for someone that they are capable of doing for themselves. As I have been detaching in increments over time, my perspective has gained clarity from a formerly muddy view. I am astounded at how I have been “played” (manipulated and coerced) to take on so many of the alcoholic’s responsibilities, both monumental and minor. I also blindly stepped in and anticipated what may be needed, and have even soothed the alcoholic’s self-pitying moods!
As a result of my “overly responsible” behavior, I end up bewildered and drained of my energy and resources. Part of my insanity is my tenacious ability to regroup and try again from a slightly different angle! However, the only person in the relationship that has the drive and capacity to change is me!
At first, it was hard to “step back.” I still had that relentless urge to protect and accommodate. I feared the alcoholic’s rages and verbal tirades that happened regularly during interactions. However, I have found significant serenity in limiting my exposure to the alcoholic.
In order to “let go” and focus on myself, I have created a safe space with a lock on the door. This room is equipped with cable, Wi-Fi, computer/printer, books, recovery materials, journals, fan, bed, and a lounge chair. Within this room, I am insulated from hearing any of the routine shenanigans and am less likely to worry over the alcoholic getting home safely.
Although I am powerless over alcohol and the alcoholic … I still have power in my life. I am gaining momentum as I disengage from the mayhem and curtail my fruitless guilt-laden patterns of “rescue.” As my mindset expands, more choices appear as if by magic! Going forward, I endeavor to spend my time more proactively in alignment with my values. I am exploring fresh dreams!
Concept Five
The rights of appeal and petition protect the minorities and insure that they be heard. Do you journal? Have you ever wanted to be a published author?
Expand your journaling into an article representing your experience, strength, and hope. As you've seen, the BITS accepts articles, poems, and historical perspectives — just about anything recovery-related. Write something for the newsletter, send it to us, and we'll get it published. newslettereditor@seattle-al-anon.org Pen Names Accepted |
2022-2025 Service ManualThe 2022-2025 Al-Anon/Alateen Service Manual is now available to download. Published versions will be available later this year.
(click below to open the Service Manual) Literature SalesFree Shipping Extended (again) We are excited to help our members (within Districts 14-22) during this difficult time. We are continuing our sale until JUNE 30th, 2022. Free shipping and no WSO surcharge for orders that are placed and paid online. We will strive to ship orders by the Thursday after payment is received. Literature order forms are available at https://seattle-al-anon.org/literature.html. For easy processing, follow the instructions on the literature order forms and email LDC@seattle-al-anon.org. The office will remain closed until further notice. |
Today's Forum is definitely a colorful, image-laden treat. It has vibrant colors from cover to cover. But when looking at the Forum from the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s, all we see is simple text on white paper. There were very few illustrations or images. Even the photos were all blue. So when did that change happen … why? ... and how?
I found part of the answer in the Al-Anon history book, Many Voices, One Journey (B-31), which clarifies how the Forum changed. "The 1977 World Service Conference voted to expand the Al-Anon Family Groups Forum newsletter into a 32-page monthly magazine. The new format would allow for a more in-depth perspective on topics, including longer personal stories, and interviews with professionals" (p 198). The change to this new format was brought on by the growth of the organization and a need and desire to transcend the simple blue and white newsletter of its past.
I found part of the answer in the Al-Anon history book, Many Voices, One Journey (B-31), which clarifies how the Forum changed. "The 1977 World Service Conference voted to expand the Al-Anon Family Groups Forum newsletter into a 32-page monthly magazine. The new format would allow for a more in-depth perspective on topics, including longer personal stories, and interviews with professionals" (p 198). The change to this new format was brought on by the growth of the organization and a need and desire to transcend the simple blue and white newsletter of its past.
Another part of the answer comes from two issues of the Forum. On the last two pages of the April 1978 issue, the upcoming change is mentioned a few times. "Starting next month, with the May issue, the FORUM, the voice of Al-Anon, will be published in magazine form, fulfilling the idea given to the FORUM committee by the 1977 Conference and the Board of Trustees." They continue, "the purpose of this change is to give each member a greater opportunity to both be heard and to hear the message of Al-Anon." While the goal of the FORUM will stay the same, "the expanded format will provide the opportunity to publish longer personal stories and in-depth discussions of vital topics."
In the following issue, now with a full-color cover and color images throughout, we learned more about this change in May 1978. "With this issue of the FORUM, the outward form changes. The message it carries, however, the message of hope and the sharing of members' concerns, joys and love will not change. The FORUM will continue to say that there is beauty and each of us can find it in our own lives," writes the editor, Hildegard M. |
Lastly, I'd like to share the Magazine Statement of Purpose found on page 4 of the May 1978 issue. “The Forum is the medium through which Al-Anon and Alateen members worldwide share their experiences. It is a vital instrument in helping readers understand and grow in the program. It offers the opportunity for open discussion in which individuals and groups can be heard."
I hope you found this as interesting as I did. |
Order the Forum Magazine Al-Anon’s monthly magazine features timely sharings from Al-Anon and Alateen members, suggested meeting topics, and the latest information on worldwide Al-Anon recovery. Experience and insight you won’t find anywhere else! |
2022 WA Area Speakers Convention
WA Area is hosting the 2022 Speakers Convention on October 21-22, 2022, at the South Puget Sound Community College in Lacey. This is a free event, and we hope you will save the date to attend a weekend of speakers and workshop panels. The Speakers Convention Committee needs your support in financial donations to offset the cost of travel and hotel for our speakers, venue rental, etc. Please consider donating directly to our Venmo account or contact our convention treasurer at waspeakers2022@gmail.com.
Venmo for 2022 WA Area Speakers Convention
@WAAreaSpeakersConvention
Venmo for 2022 WA Area Speakers Convention
@WAAreaSpeakersConvention
Opened 7:30 PM with Serenity Prayer
Attendance: 26 total attendees
Readings: Tradition 3 read by Clif H Concept 3 read by Linda H
Secretary Report: Minutes for February 10 Council Meeting approved as amended Chair Report: Summary of the Board Meeting Welcome New Web Editor Evelyn B
Treasurer Report: Donations were down for February.
Zoom Safety PowerPoint: Doug L and Helen V. Covered ways to avoid being Zoom bombed and ways to protect Anonymity. The PowerPoint presentation slides are available from Doug L (tech@seattle-al-anon.org).
Coordinator Reports:
Communication: Newsletter: Clif H is looking for news articles as well as stories to vary the content of the BITS. (newslettettereditor@seattle-al-anon.org)
LDC: Doug L presented a Motion “to extend the sale of free literature shipping and no WSO charge to Districts 14-22 through the end of June.” Motion seconded by Mary R. Motion passed unanimously. Talk of opening the LDC to the public is underway. Volunteers are needed for this to be possible.
Phones: Dave M reports that Phones were busier in February than in January. Volunteers remain the same, and they need more. (phones@seattle-al-anon.org)
Alateen: Mary-Ann N plans to submit readings from the newsletter Alateen Talks to Bits. Alateen meetings list is getting updated on the website New Horizon’s AFG is interested in supporting an Alateen meeting. AMIAS training dates: Initial-4/30 and 5/21; Recertification-4/16 and 5/14
Old Business: A chair is needed for the Outdoor Fellowship Event (Resentment Bonfire). We have a credit with Seattle Parks and Recreation.
New Business: Time for GR/AGR sharing ESH with in-person, concurrent, and hybrid meetings. Moved to April Agenda Meeting adjourned 8:59 with Al-Anon/Alateen Declaration
Minutes respectfully submitted by Elizabeth G, Secretary
Attendance: 26 total attendees
Readings: Tradition 3 read by Clif H Concept 3 read by Linda H
Secretary Report: Minutes for February 10 Council Meeting approved as amended Chair Report: Summary of the Board Meeting Welcome New Web Editor Evelyn B
Treasurer Report: Donations were down for February.
Zoom Safety PowerPoint: Doug L and Helen V. Covered ways to avoid being Zoom bombed and ways to protect Anonymity. The PowerPoint presentation slides are available from Doug L (tech@seattle-al-anon.org).
Coordinator Reports:
Communication: Newsletter: Clif H is looking for news articles as well as stories to vary the content of the BITS. (newslettettereditor@seattle-al-anon.org)
LDC: Doug L presented a Motion “to extend the sale of free literature shipping and no WSO charge to Districts 14-22 through the end of June.” Motion seconded by Mary R. Motion passed unanimously. Talk of opening the LDC to the public is underway. Volunteers are needed for this to be possible.
Phones: Dave M reports that Phones were busier in February than in January. Volunteers remain the same, and they need more. (phones@seattle-al-anon.org)
Alateen: Mary-Ann N plans to submit readings from the newsletter Alateen Talks to Bits. Alateen meetings list is getting updated on the website New Horizon’s AFG is interested in supporting an Alateen meeting. AMIAS training dates: Initial-4/30 and 5/21; Recertification-4/16 and 5/14
Old Business: A chair is needed for the Outdoor Fellowship Event (Resentment Bonfire). We have a credit with Seattle Parks and Recreation.
New Business: Time for GR/AGR sharing ESH with in-person, concurrent, and hybrid meetings. Moved to April Agenda Meeting adjourned 8:59 with Al-Anon/Alateen Declaration
Minutes respectfully submitted by Elizabeth G, Secretary
Opened with Serenity Prayer 7:30
Attendance: 19 total attendees
Readings: Tradition 4 - Doug L, Concept 4 - Dave M
Secretary’s Report: Elizabeth G asked for a Motion to accept the March Minutes as written. Clif H motioned, seconded by Will W. Motion Passed.
Treasurer’s Report: Mariann M shared that the AIS Donations and Book sales were robust in March. We are still in the hole with about $2500 due to the outlay of money for new computers and insurance.
Vice Chair’s Report: Helen V shared that the By-Laws committee will meet at the end of this month. They hope to have the Bylaws and the Standing Rules & Procedures Manual (SRPM) to share at the Council Meeting in May.
COORDINATORS REPORTS:
LDC: Julie R shared we have a new home volunteer being trained. We still need office volunteers. Doug L shared that due to the shortage of How Al-Anon Works, we are limiting sales to 1 per customer and 3 per AFG. Julie R and Doug L are planning a job description for Office Volunteers.
Phones: Dave M shared that out of 97 calls in March, ½ were Al-Anon related, the rest were SPAM. Still need coverage in weekly daytime hours.
Communications: Cheré F reminded us to keep our meeting change information up to date. We have a new Web Editor.
Alateen: Helen V for Mary-Ann N: To add to her Alateen blurb...AMIAS training May 7th.
Old Business: Heather has someone in her group interested in Chairing an outdoor fellowship event.
New Business: GRs shared ESH on how their meetings are doing or not doing. Hybrid meetings are working with some technical difficulties. One meeting is hybrid with phone participation with no tech difficulty. Zoom meetings require more service positions. In-person meetings are slowly coming back. So far, WSO has put the Areas in charge of whether to include Zoom Meetings or not. Filling service positions remains a challenge.
WA Area Speakers Meeting, Oct 21st - 22nd in Lacey, WA. All volunteer hosting. Please see the flyer in the BITS for contact info. Many positions open for service.
Meeting adjourned at 8:57 pm with Linda H leading Al-Anon/Alateen Declaration
Minutes respectfully submitted by Elizabeth G, Secretary
Attendance: 19 total attendees
Readings: Tradition 4 - Doug L, Concept 4 - Dave M
Secretary’s Report: Elizabeth G asked for a Motion to accept the March Minutes as written. Clif H motioned, seconded by Will W. Motion Passed.
Treasurer’s Report: Mariann M shared that the AIS Donations and Book sales were robust in March. We are still in the hole with about $2500 due to the outlay of money for new computers and insurance.
Vice Chair’s Report: Helen V shared that the By-Laws committee will meet at the end of this month. They hope to have the Bylaws and the Standing Rules & Procedures Manual (SRPM) to share at the Council Meeting in May.
COORDINATORS REPORTS:
LDC: Julie R shared we have a new home volunteer being trained. We still need office volunteers. Doug L shared that due to the shortage of How Al-Anon Works, we are limiting sales to 1 per customer and 3 per AFG. Julie R and Doug L are planning a job description for Office Volunteers.
Phones: Dave M shared that out of 97 calls in March, ½ were Al-Anon related, the rest were SPAM. Still need coverage in weekly daytime hours.
Communications: Cheré F reminded us to keep our meeting change information up to date. We have a new Web Editor.
Alateen: Helen V for Mary-Ann N: To add to her Alateen blurb...AMIAS training May 7th.
Old Business: Heather has someone in her group interested in Chairing an outdoor fellowship event.
New Business: GRs shared ESH on how their meetings are doing or not doing. Hybrid meetings are working with some technical difficulties. One meeting is hybrid with phone participation with no tech difficulty. Zoom meetings require more service positions. In-person meetings are slowly coming back. So far, WSO has put the Areas in charge of whether to include Zoom Meetings or not. Filling service positions remains a challenge.
WA Area Speakers Meeting, Oct 21st - 22nd in Lacey, WA. All volunteer hosting. Please see the flyer in the BITS for contact info. Many positions open for service.
Meeting adjourned at 8:57 pm with Linda H leading Al-Anon/Alateen Declaration
Minutes respectfully submitted by Elizabeth G, Secretary
Thank you for your donations and your support of AIS!
Our funding now comes primarily from:
*Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
*Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
Donate Now
Our funding now comes primarily from:
*Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
*Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
Donate Now
And More ...
Please visit our Members section for the most up-to-date information on: