A Man Gives Men a Flower
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When I met with my sponsor, six guys were there. So, I asked, “How responsible am I for my loved one’s happiness?” It was almost a chorus. “You're not responsible at all.” It was striking. Revelatory. Life changing! It set me on the path. Another’s happiness is an outside issue. For what things am I responsible? I did the work. I reviewed it with my sponsor. We considered it from the principles of the program. I began implementation to address the few things for which I could be responsible and I have found serenity. I change the things I can and accept the things I can't and recognize each day: the largest thing I can’t change is another's happiness. |
Access to Al-Anon Literature
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As life does there are always changes in our personal lives. Right now, life has changed for some us in LDC. We NEED VOLUNTEERS to facilitate your literature orders.
The two positions are Home Volunteer and Shipper. The Home Volunteer takes as little as an hour a day, computer access, and as the title implies you don’t even have to leave home to do it. The Shipper position is 2-3 hours in the office, generally once a month. Both positions come with training, assistance, and fellowship with other volunteers. This is an easy way to perform service in Al-Anon, and grow your personal program. Please contact Mary R or Linda H at LDC@seattle-al-anon.org if you would like to join us. Ordering note. Download the order form from the web site Purchase Literature - GREATER SEATTLE AL-ANON AND ALATEEN (seattle-al-anon.org) to your desktop, fill it out completely, then attach it to an email and send it to LDC@seattle-al-anon.org When LDC receives it, we will process an invoice and email the invoice to you. It will have the Review and Pay Now button on it. After you review, click that button and follow the credit card instructions. Step ElevenSought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact
with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. 
Photo by Clif H
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Phone Volunteers Needed
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Debris Collection
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Photo by Clif H
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I recently had the opportunity to travel back to my home town to assist my parents. During my weeks there, I took time every day for myself in my attempt to maintain a level of sanity. It mostly worked.
As I was walking along the mighty Yellowstone River one day, I saw what could be described as a pile of organic debris. Since my goal for the walk was to work my program for the benefit of my sanity, I related the debris to that of the effects of alcohol on me. Like the effects of alcoholism, it started out as a small stick or two, those managed to grab a larger stick, then most of a tree, and surrounding that began a collection of character defects. Soon enough there was a significant impediment to the flow of the river’s water, or, in context, development of my insane behavior.
By working Step 4, I’ve been able to identify individual defects (sticks and rocks), as well as, defect patterns (the big logs). Working Steps 5 through 7, I’m able to begin removing the debris. More work; more and more effective removal.
As we know though, it doesn’t stop there. Complacency will result in the repopulation of the debris pile in the river. Leading me to understand that I must be ever vigilant keeping the area clean or else the river and I will again collect debris (or the resurfacing defects of character). I find that once I let one defect resurface, if I don’t get active in the program, a second or additional character defects resurface too.
So, for me, during my travels, it took constant effort and practice of the program to stay connected to my sanity.
As I was walking along the mighty Yellowstone River one day, I saw what could be described as a pile of organic debris. Since my goal for the walk was to work my program for the benefit of my sanity, I related the debris to that of the effects of alcohol on me. Like the effects of alcoholism, it started out as a small stick or two, those managed to grab a larger stick, then most of a tree, and surrounding that began a collection of character defects. Soon enough there was a significant impediment to the flow of the river’s water, or, in context, development of my insane behavior.
By working Step 4, I’ve been able to identify individual defects (sticks and rocks), as well as, defect patterns (the big logs). Working Steps 5 through 7, I’m able to begin removing the debris. More work; more and more effective removal.
As we know though, it doesn’t stop there. Complacency will result in the repopulation of the debris pile in the river. Leading me to understand that I must be ever vigilant keeping the area clean or else the river and I will again collect debris (or the resurfacing defects of character). I find that once I let one defect resurface, if I don’t get active in the program, a second or additional character defects resurface too.
So, for me, during my travels, it took constant effort and practice of the program to stay connected to my sanity.
The Right to Feel
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Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we
need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, films, and TV. We need guard with special care the anonymity of all AA members. |
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Has Your Meeting Changed?
Changes and Updates are made Weekly. (Seattle AIS is automatically cc'd in the change request) If you have any questions or concerns regarding the Seattle AIS updated meeting schedule, please contact meetingdirectoryeditor@seattle-al-anon.org 
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AIS Council Meeting
The next Council meeting is Thursday, November 9th, 2023, 7:30-9:00 pm. Click the AIS website 2023 Calendar link on the Events page (https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/events) for the zoom information. NOTE Meeting Topics: Officer Elections & 2024 Budget Presentation 
Concept Eleven
Need a Free Newcomer Packet?Anyone local to Seattle who is a newcomer and wants an individual newcomer packet (or in Spanish, too!), please send an email to outreach@seattle-al-anon.org with the name and mailing address. |
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Bucket of CrabsI have heard this analogy used lately, on several recovery podcasts. As a crab tries to crawl out of a bucket, the others will inevitably hook them back in, blocking their escape. The crabs could represent a family, a group of friends, or any relationships that surround a person. The bucket represents a trap or dangerous space to spend time in. For this example, the bucket surrounding the crabs is alcoholism.
As alcoholism encompasses the entire family in a diseased dynamic, people become comfortable with damaging behaviors. If one member tries to get healthy and break free of the chaos, the others tend to work hard to drag them back in by any means possible. |
Artwork by Callie D
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What are my personal latch points that make me vulnerable to the confinement of the bucket syndrome? I am going to name some of my adversarial crabs:
Alcoholics tend to be expert victims. Therefore, one of my latch points is feeling sorry for the alcoholic. The messes they are making of their life, the depression they wallow in, the stupid choices they routinely make. I sometimes find myself stepping in to try to protect the alcoholic or soothe them, and that only gets me more bucket time.
Another hook for me is feeling guilty if I’m not available to rescue them. I feel this sick sense of obligation and responsibility. These feelings are extremely uncomfortable and the alcoholic latches on with manipulation and double binds to get me to do their bidding.
An additional point of entrapment for me, is the fear of the volatile rage that erupts when the alcoholic doesn’t get their way. As I have tried to establish reasonable boundaries, the alcoholic regularly becomes sarcastic and disrespectful. It is exhausting living with an adult toddler who lacks rational thought and refuses to cooperate in their own best interests! This leaves me without the strength to even try to climb out of the bucket!
Loneliness and the desire to try to connect with the alcoholic often leaves me vulnerable. As I place a claw over the top of the bucket, and shift my protruding eyes over the edge, that’s enough to get gripped, while they get ripped!
As I become more aware of my latch points, I can work on changing the things I can. By learning to focus on ourselves, our attitudes and well-being improve.
Detachment (https://al-anon.org/pdf/S19.pdf)
Alcoholics tend to be expert victims. Therefore, one of my latch points is feeling sorry for the alcoholic. The messes they are making of their life, the depression they wallow in, the stupid choices they routinely make. I sometimes find myself stepping in to try to protect the alcoholic or soothe them, and that only gets me more bucket time.
Another hook for me is feeling guilty if I’m not available to rescue them. I feel this sick sense of obligation and responsibility. These feelings are extremely uncomfortable and the alcoholic latches on with manipulation and double binds to get me to do their bidding.
An additional point of entrapment for me, is the fear of the volatile rage that erupts when the alcoholic doesn’t get their way. As I have tried to establish reasonable boundaries, the alcoholic regularly becomes sarcastic and disrespectful. It is exhausting living with an adult toddler who lacks rational thought and refuses to cooperate in their own best interests! This leaves me without the strength to even try to climb out of the bucket!
Loneliness and the desire to try to connect with the alcoholic often leaves me vulnerable. As I place a claw over the top of the bucket, and shift my protruding eyes over the edge, that’s enough to get gripped, while they get ripped!
As I become more aware of my latch points, I can work on changing the things I can. By learning to focus on ourselves, our attitudes and well-being improve.
Detachment (https://al-anon.org/pdf/S19.pdf)
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Order the Forum Magazine Al-Anon’s monthly magazine features timely sharings from Al-Anon and Alateen members, suggested meeting topics, and the latest information on worldwide Al-Anon recovery. Experience and insight you won’t find anywhere else! |
October 2023 AIS Council Meeting Minutes (Summary, not yet approved)
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Meeting Opened at 7:30 PM by Karen L Chair
Attendance: 20 individuals Introductions: all Readings: Concept 10, Dave M Secretary: Kathy K: Reading and Approval of the September Minutes. Treasurer: Gary H: FFinancial reports: Seattle AIS remains financially stable, as they work toward achieving the accepted Ample Reserve. Dave is sending thank you notes to donors and is having some trouble finding addresses to mail thank you notes. BZ suggested asking DRs to contact GRs to put their name on the check or send a thank you note to the DR. Donations through the website are captured. He will be able to file a shorter version of Federal Taxes next year which will be a much quicker process than previously. He has not finished the 2024 budget yet but soon. Chair: Karen L, Chair: November Elections: All positions are for 1 year. The officers are elected at the Council Meeting and Coordinators are appointed by the Chair. Please contact Karen L. if interested or desire more information. We are required by by-laws to have an annual meeting and approve the budget. She has talked to some people and feels good about the interest. We may use the poll capabilities in zoom to vote. Heather R. has volunteered to be phone coordinator and will take over in Dec. Vice Chair Report: Dave M: Linda and he opened the office in Oct. There were 6-7 people who attended, and fellowship was appreciated as well as they sold some literature. He is sending thank you notes to groups and individuals who are donating. Coordinators: Outreach: Solveig W: : She has had requests for Newcomer packets and has sent literature to the ICE detention center as requested. Pierce Co. AIS also donated. She attended a potential new Al-Anon meeting on D14. This was initiated by the Somali community there. It was a very good meeting and there was not a language barrier as she feared. There is some Arabic CAL from California. Communications: Jackie T: (absent) LDC: Mary R: They are very much in need of another Home Volunteer. This is a simple way to provide service to the Literature Distribution Center. It entails about an hour a day for a seven-day period about once a month. Training is provided. It does take a computer with good internet. All training is done on zoom. They could also use some more volunteers for the office opening for 2024. Four people is optimal but they can open with three. Office volunteers need to be able to make a sale on the computer, but training is available. |
The shipping volunteers work in the office one day a month on Thur. to fill orders placed by the home volunteer. The shipping positions are filled but they could use a backup.
The new daily reader “A Little Time for Myself: should be available from WSO by late Oct so they should be available from LDC by Nov. They have ordered 8 cases (almost 200 books) and WSO will let LDC know when it is available. There are available books in Spanish currently. The open house in Oct. had 6 visitors and sold $167.98 in literature. LDC coordinators think we should continue the open house in 2024. People are happy and grateful we have this service. They have accumulated many hanging file folders that are available to anyone who wants some and will be available at the Open Saturday. She asks if we want to vote to continue open office hours in 2024? Action Item: Motion to continue the open office hours the first Saturday of the month in 2024. Motion passed with 21 in favor, 0 nays and 1 abstention Phones: Dave M (outgoing Coordinator): 108/180 (61%) shifts were covered in Sept. There are 10 active volunteers with no new volunteers. There were 50 calls and 34 were actual Al-Anon calls (second highest num-ber this year). This is a great number in terms of actually being able to be of service. Texting is picking up and a great way to share information. He met with the volunteers on 9/21/23 and all remained committed to continuing the phone service. He got some good ideas but no changes were made. Tech: Pierre J: He has met with meeting and events coordinators to be of assistance. He has been looking at software for Office Acrobat which is easier than Adobe to help with the price list for literature. Old Business: We have a positive budget this year and have money for outreach and need to make a decision on how best to spend it. New Business: : Solving, Outreach Coordinator: Outreach Campaign/Budget options presented by Solveig W. There was significant discussion on the available presented options. Action Item: It was moved and seconded that AIS commit to the Sound Transit option summarized below. There were 13 in favor, 1 against and 2 abstentions. The motion passed. Sound Transit: This is a new option to place information plaques on buses and light rail in King, Pierce, and Snohomish counties. The cards would be above the seats and 11x17 inches in size. The campaign will take place over a 2 year period. Seventh Tradition: https://www.seattle-al-anon.org/donationinfo.html Next Council Meeting: Thursday, November 9th, 2023 from 7:30-9:00 PM: Officer Elections & 2024 Budget Presentation Next Board Meeting: Thursday, October 19th, 2023 at 7:00 PM Adjournment: Al-Anon/Alateen Declaration at 9:07 PM Submitted by Kathy K, Secretary |
Thank you for your donations and your support of AIS!
Our funding now comes primarily from:
*Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
*Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
Donate Now
Our funding now comes primarily from:
*Donations by Members, Groups, and Districts
*Literature Sales
Please send all AIS mail, including checks for literature orders and donations, to:
Seattle AIS
505 Broadway E #400
Seattle, WA 98102-5023
Donate Now
And More ...
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MEETING SCHEDULE: registered Al-Anon groups in the Greater Seattle Area. Hybrid, Concurrent, and in-person meetings are listed.
Please visit our Members section for the most up-to-date information on:
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Meeting NewsNews from the Meeting Directory Editor
The following changes were made during October.
Wren B Seattle Al-Anon Information Service Meeting Directory Editor |