Geoff N. (GN) spoke at Lois’s Birthday Celebration on February 29 this year and Karen G. (KG) is scheduled to speak at the Slice of Serenity in Renton on April 25. We are so grateful for their service and that of all Al-Anon event speakers. The Bits Newsletter Editor (Bits) asked them to share what it’s like to be an Al-Anon speaker.

Bits: When were you first approached by another member to be an Al-Anon speaker?
KG: The first time I spoke was in Wisconsin in 1989.
GN: My sponsor was the driver in getting me to speak. My back-up sponsor has asked me to speak at many events, too.

Bits: How did you feel at first when they asked you?
KG: That first time I was terrified! I was pretty new in recovery, and it felt scary to say some of the things I said out loud. This second time I felt honored and happy that they would want me (again).
GN: I hesitated.

Bits: When you said yes, can you remember why?
KG: My sponsor told me to never say no to an Al Anon request for service. I wasn't allowed to say no without a good reason.
GN: I was told that I cannot say no to a request for service because I would be saying no to myself.

Bits: In the days leading up to an event how did you feel?
KG: I always feel nervous leading up to the date, but I want to share a good story in a manner that will be well received. I know it's in Higher Power's hands, but I still worry a little bit.

Bits: When you speak at events, do you prepare notes? or speak off-the-cuff?
KG: I have an outline that I follow and update periodically. But then I speak from the heart. The outline keeps me from getting too far off track.
GN: I don’t wing it. I have a plan. It’s important for me to be myself, but also to stay in the solution and not dwell on the bad stuff.

Bits: Do you seek guidance? from another member? from recorded shares? from Higher Power?
KG: I try to always let my sponsor know that I have a speaker meeting coming up. She's in Wisconsin so she doesn't get to attend unless it's online. I enjoy listening to other speakers and that has been helpful to hear how they share their stories.
GN: I need someone in recovery to listen to my share, give me honest feedback, remind me to keep the focus on my story.

Bits: How do you decide what to speak about? your first step? your journey with a particular aspect of recovery? a topic that is given to you?
KG: I stick to a general format, what was it like? what happened? what is it like now? unless there is a specific topic.
GN: My sponsor encourages me to talk about my family, especially my daughters because people relate to stories about family members.

Bits: How does the experience of speaking at events help with your recovery?
KG: It helps me know, or remember, that sharing about the effects of alcoholism on family members doesn't need to remain secret or shameful.
GN: When I get feedback, I learn how to be myself and let Higher Power come through my words.

Bits: What do you learn about yourself and other people when you speak at events?
KG: The things I have been through and recovered from can give comfort and healing to others in similar situations. People are eager to hear about recovery. I feel more connected to others in recovery. Each time I begin by thinking: I hope this is helpful to someone.
GN: I have learned that I am most comfortable communicating in images. I like using visuals in my Al-Anon presentations. Not everyone has responded favorably, (especially not to PowerPoint). Now I use some visuals, but not as much as I used to.

Bits: Do you prefer one format for speaking? (In-person, Zoom, hybrid, speaker events, speaker meetings?) Why?
KG: Mostly I've done in-person, and a few Zoom meetings since the pandemic. I guess I prefer in-person because I usually get hugs afterwards.
GN: Any meeting is OK with me. I especially like Zoom and hybrid because I can use more visuals. It’s more accepted in that format. But I am sensitive to what the meeting wants.

Bits: Is there anything you would like to share about your experience as a speaker that might encourage other members to offer themselves as speakers?
KG: Do it if you get the opportunity. You don't have to be a polished public speaker, or funny, or tell a story perfectly. It's best to be yourself; tell your story, not the alcoholic’s. Do some prep and then speak from the heart and trust that God will use you to share His message as He thinks best.
GN: You’ve got to have a passion for recovery to be a speaker that people want to hear.

Bits: Is there anything you would like to share with the organizers of events and meetings to help them find speakers?
KG: Ask someone who you wouldn't expect would want to. It may surprise you both!

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